ANDRE BEGIN

As much as our youth-obsessed society might tell us that we shouldn’t make negative statements about our age for fear of it turning into a self-fulfilling prophecy, I tend to think that we can make an exception from time to time.

I know that I take good care of myself, I listen to the advice from my medical professionals, and I apply it as often as I can. I eat well, I exercise, and I tend to keep treats as treats. My life is filled with activities I enjoy, incorporating a healthy component of socializing.

Just the same, it doesn’t change the fact that I have experienced 60 years of wear and tear on this little body and the unavoidable reality that boo-boos don’t heal at the same rate as they used to.

That being the case, there are occasions when I feel perfectly justified in blaming my age for opting out of certain activities and then not feeling guilty about it.

For example, after injuring my back (twice!) when moving my snow tires from the garage to my car trunk, I decided that this was the end of the road for me. Sure, I could save money by continuing to store my winter tires at home; however, what little I saved, I ended up paying a chiropractor to reset my back. Plus, when you factor in the energy expended on back pain, how much did I really save in the long run? After saying to myself, “Maybe I’m too old for this,” I decided that it was time to start paying to store my tires with the dealer.

Similarly, there have been some minor services here and there that I used to handle myself, but that I contracted out to professionals when time, energy, and expertise were not on my side. Of course, I could take the time to learn and do more things for myself, but why should I spend hours on a learning curve (away from the computer, when I could be working on my next blog article or screenplay) when the option to hire someone who would have the job done professionally and in a fraction of the time is on the table?

It’s also the admission that I don’t have the time or energy to chase every cause or issue that comes my way. I may care about them, but I know that my attention is needed elsewhere first.

At 60, I know what I enjoy, how I like to spend my time, and what my priorities are. In retirement, I much prefer a gentler pace to my day-to-day. Quality time with family and friends, whether involving a good meal, good conversation, or a special event, is the kind of activity that makes my heart sing.

Why not spend my energy and focus on those activities that can lead to moments of pure joy, rather than contorting myself psychologically for things that are not in my wheelhouse?

I also enjoy trying new things, but on my terms, on my timeline, and when my headspace is open to it.

Deep down, I’m not using my age as an excuse, but I am using it to set boundaries and save myself from rumination and energy-draining explanations. It’s strange how declining an invitation while joking that I’m afraid of breaking a hip, that my arthritis is acting up, or that it’s past my bedtime seems to be more socially acceptable than a straightforward “no, thank you.” Who knew? It’s not a self-limiting thought or something that will prematurely age me. It’s the opposite. It’s empowering me to say yes to what matters most.

At the end of the day, it’s really up to me to pick and choose those activities that are more meaningful to me and to those close to me without having to justify it to anyone. If I have to use my age as the scapegoat to lay boundaries that are easier for people to understand, then so be it.

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Sincere thanks for reading!
Have a great day,
André